Is it possible to get your ex back as a lover with just one phone call? Do you need to wait 30 days or more hoping they will forgive you, or can you vastly speed up the process? Well, if you use emotional intelligence to help your ex release their bad feelings and get to forgiveness, you can start to get them back with one phone call.
Before you even pick up the phone, remind yourself not to start by saying I'm sorry. This is a common mistake people making, apologizing over and over hoping their ex will understand and take them back. But if an apology was going to work, you'd probably already be back together. To get your ex back beginning with just one phone call, don't start with an apology!
Instead of saying I'm sorry, the first thing to do on the call is to admit what you did wrong. Own it. Say something in the vicinity of "I want to start by saying that I did you wrong. I was too controlling (or I cheated on you or whatever) and jealous." This is a critical first move.
The emotional intelligence here is powerful! Before you can get to forgiveness, you want to know that the person understands that they did something wrong. If a friend screws up and then lies about it, you have a much harder time letting it go. But if they can own up to it, you can see it as a mistake and let it go that much faster.
If it didnt mean anything, then they could do it again, couldnt they? So the first step to getting your ex back in a phone call is to admit, own, fess up to what you did wrong.
This clears the way for the next step to have a powerful emotional effect. You then admit to your ex the emotional pain you caused by what you did. So you might tell them something like "I know that what I did made you feel betrayed and unloved and unappreciated..."
With this step you are using emotional intelligence very powerfully. You are making your ex feel heard and understood at an emotional level. You are mirroring their probable feelings. They will now often begin to feel that you really do know how much you screwed up.
There are other steps to take in this one phone call to get your ex back, but if you just take these first two with your ex before you get to apologizing you will be much more likely to win them back. Before they can take you back they need to release their bad feelings and forgive you, and these two steps will help them get there much faster than just saying Im sorry. - 15437
Before you even pick up the phone, remind yourself not to start by saying I'm sorry. This is a common mistake people making, apologizing over and over hoping their ex will understand and take them back. But if an apology was going to work, you'd probably already be back together. To get your ex back beginning with just one phone call, don't start with an apology!
Instead of saying I'm sorry, the first thing to do on the call is to admit what you did wrong. Own it. Say something in the vicinity of "I want to start by saying that I did you wrong. I was too controlling (or I cheated on you or whatever) and jealous." This is a critical first move.
The emotional intelligence here is powerful! Before you can get to forgiveness, you want to know that the person understands that they did something wrong. If a friend screws up and then lies about it, you have a much harder time letting it go. But if they can own up to it, you can see it as a mistake and let it go that much faster.
If it didnt mean anything, then they could do it again, couldnt they? So the first step to getting your ex back in a phone call is to admit, own, fess up to what you did wrong.
This clears the way for the next step to have a powerful emotional effect. You then admit to your ex the emotional pain you caused by what you did. So you might tell them something like "I know that what I did made you feel betrayed and unloved and unappreciated..."
With this step you are using emotional intelligence very powerfully. You are making your ex feel heard and understood at an emotional level. You are mirroring their probable feelings. They will now often begin to feel that you really do know how much you screwed up.
There are other steps to take in this one phone call to get your ex back, but if you just take these first two with your ex before you get to apologizing you will be much more likely to win them back. Before they can take you back they need to release their bad feelings and forgive you, and these two steps will help them get there much faster than just saying Im sorry. - 15437
About the Author:
You can learn Immediate Reconnect Strategies to get your ex back in a book about Get Your Ex Back In One Phone Call. Johnnie S Laney teaches relationship and emotional intelligence courses and you can get the free course 7 Vital Relationship Insights You Never Learned In School here at Love Relationship Advice.