The breakup is real and you're hating it. You can hardly function- sleep is impossible, you aren't eating right and you look and feel awful. You didn't know it could hurt this bad. But it does. And you believe the only way to stop the hurt is to win your ex back. But how?
You're probably having a million thoughts running through your mind- regrets, and all sorts of questions. What if? But the truth of the matter is you are going to have to either:
Come up with a plan to get your ex back, and
Find a way to live until it happens, or
Accept that it's over and move on
Soul-searching is called for, but almost impossible to do when your heart is aching. The first thing you're going to have to do is give yourself some time. The worst thing you could do is react out of fear and panic. Doing so will push your ex farther away. Get some help dealing with the hurt if it's overwhelming, but don't go begging now. It won't work and will probably make things worse.
After you've gathered yourself and the initial pain has subsided somewhat, resume your normal activities the best you can. Eat well, exercise, and keep your connection to others and the outside world strong. Avoid alcohol and other useless means of escape, as you need to be clear. Meditate or pray if it helps.
If you really want to win your ex back, you're going to have to come up with a plan that will re-open their heart to you. They loved you before- they can love you again. Just remember- you can't force some one to love you. Encourage or invite, but not force. That means you'll need to remind them why they loved you in the first place. If there's any love left at all, you can find a way to rekindle it.
How? Tell them what they need to hear. Listen to them without rehashing the whole breakup, and without blame. Come to them with caring and confidence. Don't beg, but do apologize if you need to. Take your time. This is a person who knows you and loved you- probably still loves you. With patience and thoughtfulness you can find a way to regain their trust and their affection. Just don't rush, don't push, and be straight with yourself.
Good luck! Susie - 15437
You're probably having a million thoughts running through your mind- regrets, and all sorts of questions. What if? But the truth of the matter is you are going to have to either:
Come up with a plan to get your ex back, and
Find a way to live until it happens, or
Accept that it's over and move on
Soul-searching is called for, but almost impossible to do when your heart is aching. The first thing you're going to have to do is give yourself some time. The worst thing you could do is react out of fear and panic. Doing so will push your ex farther away. Get some help dealing with the hurt if it's overwhelming, but don't go begging now. It won't work and will probably make things worse.
After you've gathered yourself and the initial pain has subsided somewhat, resume your normal activities the best you can. Eat well, exercise, and keep your connection to others and the outside world strong. Avoid alcohol and other useless means of escape, as you need to be clear. Meditate or pray if it helps.
If you really want to win your ex back, you're going to have to come up with a plan that will re-open their heart to you. They loved you before- they can love you again. Just remember- you can't force some one to love you. Encourage or invite, but not force. That means you'll need to remind them why they loved you in the first place. If there's any love left at all, you can find a way to rekindle it.
How? Tell them what they need to hear. Listen to them without rehashing the whole breakup, and without blame. Come to them with caring and confidence. Don't beg, but do apologize if you need to. Take your time. This is a person who knows you and loved you- probably still loves you. With patience and thoughtfulness you can find a way to regain their trust and their affection. Just don't rush, don't push, and be straight with yourself.
Good luck! Susie - 15437
About the Author:
Susie Kempton has 20 years experience in relationship counceling, is highly regarded in her field and provides a free 7 day guide on How to Win Back Love by visiting her website dedicated to providing ideas and solutions on How to Get Your Ex Back
