When dating, you will probably run into some resistance when it's time to get amorous. This won't always happen, but it'll occur enough to where you'll need to know what to do about it.
Most guys mistake this resistance for rejection. They aren't willing to put up a fight over it, just going along with it.
What they don't know is that resistance can be overcome - and you can do it without being a jerk or forcing the girl to do something she doesn't want to do.
Typically, there are 2 causes of this type of resistance.
The first cause is LOGICAL. This is typically the easiest type of resistance to overcome. Logical resistance is where women think up objections to the two of you getting together. These objections sometimes include:
1. Are we moving too fast? I don't want him to think I'm easy.
2. I don't want to get pregnant or catch a disease.
3. What will my friends think if I hook up with this guy?
4. How do I know he's not just trying to use me?
5. I really like this guy and I don't want to screw it up by sleeping with him too soon.
And on, and on, and on.
The second cause is EMOTIONAL. This resistance stems from feelings that suddenly flare up. She might feel afraid, or insecure, or nervous, and give into these feelings, and come up with some type of excuse to do so.
Obviously, guys have a hard time with the emotional objections because they are usually oblivious to what the girl is feeling to begin with!
So What's the answer here? How do we deal with this resistance?
This resistance shows up because we haven't done things right. Odds are, we moved way too fast, and the girl became skittish, then shut down.
All resistance, whether it be logical or emotional, stems from a lack of 2 critical things:
1.) TRUST
2.) COMFORT
When a woman trusts you and is completely comfortable with you, you will never experience any resistance from her. EVER. It is only when these things are lacking that resistance rears it's ugly head.
So in order to prevent resistance from occuring, you really have to focus on getting the girl you're with to trust you and feel comfortable with you.
When you do meet with resistance, it's important to work on developing more trust and comfort with the girl.
So how does one create trust and comfort?
Well, the two go hand in hand. If you can create one, the other will follow. The first way you can do this is to be relaxed and have fun when you're with the girl. Cracking jokes, laughing, and having a good time will relax her and make her feel comfortable around you.
Refrain from judging her and other people too harshly. Lack of trust and comfort usually stems from being judged and criticized. You need to let her know that she can make mistakes around you, and you won't punish her for them.
Make her feel safe. Let her know you're there for her when she needs you, and that you care for her. This goes a long way towards building trust and comfort.
You have to make sure not to get upset about any resistance. This can make things worse, and will not help you. Talk to her about it. She needs to see you acknowledge the problem. If she can voice it, she can work through it.
Over time she'll get comfortable enough with the situation, and that resistance will become a thing of the past. - 15437
Most guys mistake this resistance for rejection. They aren't willing to put up a fight over it, just going along with it.
What they don't know is that resistance can be overcome - and you can do it without being a jerk or forcing the girl to do something she doesn't want to do.
Typically, there are 2 causes of this type of resistance.
The first cause is LOGICAL. This is typically the easiest type of resistance to overcome. Logical resistance is where women think up objections to the two of you getting together. These objections sometimes include:
1. Are we moving too fast? I don't want him to think I'm easy.
2. I don't want to get pregnant or catch a disease.
3. What will my friends think if I hook up with this guy?
4. How do I know he's not just trying to use me?
5. I really like this guy and I don't want to screw it up by sleeping with him too soon.
And on, and on, and on.
The second cause is EMOTIONAL. This resistance stems from feelings that suddenly flare up. She might feel afraid, or insecure, or nervous, and give into these feelings, and come up with some type of excuse to do so.
Obviously, guys have a hard time with the emotional objections because they are usually oblivious to what the girl is feeling to begin with!
So What's the answer here? How do we deal with this resistance?
This resistance shows up because we haven't done things right. Odds are, we moved way too fast, and the girl became skittish, then shut down.
All resistance, whether it be logical or emotional, stems from a lack of 2 critical things:
1.) TRUST
2.) COMFORT
When a woman trusts you and is completely comfortable with you, you will never experience any resistance from her. EVER. It is only when these things are lacking that resistance rears it's ugly head.
So in order to prevent resistance from occuring, you really have to focus on getting the girl you're with to trust you and feel comfortable with you.
When you do meet with resistance, it's important to work on developing more trust and comfort with the girl.
So how does one create trust and comfort?
Well, the two go hand in hand. If you can create one, the other will follow. The first way you can do this is to be relaxed and have fun when you're with the girl. Cracking jokes, laughing, and having a good time will relax her and make her feel comfortable around you.
Refrain from judging her and other people too harshly. Lack of trust and comfort usually stems from being judged and criticized. You need to let her know that she can make mistakes around you, and you won't punish her for them.
Make her feel safe. Let her know you're there for her when she needs you, and that you care for her. This goes a long way towards building trust and comfort.
You have to make sure not to get upset about any resistance. This can make things worse, and will not help you. Talk to her about it. She needs to see you acknowledge the problem. If she can voice it, she can work through it.
Over time she'll get comfortable enough with the situation, and that resistance will become a thing of the past. - 15437
About the Author:
It doesn't have to be hard to meet women. Go to Joseph Matthew's website and sign up for his free meet women newsletter to learn how to make it simple.
