Once you start traveling down the marriage highway, it is easy to forget that one great way to keep the love alive is to spend "just you two" time. Especially after you started adding kids in the mix. We have being using Friday Night Date Night as just the way to have that time. We initially found that finding the time, money, and babysitter made the ideas of date seem like too much trouble very often. Then we some how, heard about it I think, came up with a way that made all the obstacles disappear. And I believe that our relationship reflects the benefit of that night out.
We have five kids, ranging from 15 down to 9 years of age. We also happen to have some friends in a similar situation " they've got five also, though their range is a little younger. That's the key to this whole system - friends in the same boat as you.
How does it work?
What we do is quite simple - every Friday, one couple or the other has a date night. We alternate Fridays, and believe me, we very rarely miss. This is the way it works: On our date night, Julie will take the kids over to our friends house at 5:30. Kathlyn feeds the kids dinner - a big pot of spaghetti or something. After that, the kids will play with each other until about 9 when Kat brings them home to our house and puts them to bed, while Jeff puts their kids to bed. Then, Kathlyn will stay at our house until we get home, which is basically whenever we want to. When we get home, Kat goes home. The next week, we switch and they get their date night.
What's the big deal?
Let me tell you why this cinchy plan, has tremendous results for your marriage. Everything in life doesn't have to be hard to be successful, right?
* A consistent, responsible babysitter who is never late nor seldom backs out. You gotta remember the babysitter has a date already on the books for next week that depends on yours going off without a hitch.
* Doesn't cost a thing! Remember the 5 kids - a night out can cost a small king's ransom.
* It is a lot to expect a teenage girl to handle 5 children. So when you have families who do this with kids close to the same age, they tend to just do their thing. Little care needed. And we have the credentials to handle them all too!
*The old "I just trained my sitter and now she has a job, boyfriend, life, ____(fill in the blank)". And your out of luck. Doesn't happen here.
* You don't have to worry about phone calls. Stressing about what's going on at home can suck the fun out of a date faster than you can say "Help!!!!".
* There is no one to drive home or to pickup to take home. Everyone is in bed and has their own car (we actually live so close we walk back and forth a lot!) to get on their way. No dread dessert with this lovely meal, thanks!
* The house is always clean when we get here, since the kids weren't here all night. So no getting up on Saturday to throw away pizza boxes and pop cans.
* And if those weren't enough reasons, the mom who stays home always has some "her time" after she puts the other couples kids to bed. How nice to relax and catch up on the stack of mail or play Wii without the kids nagging at your inability!
My older kids can babysit my younger kids. So how does that work?
I don't know about you, but even though my older kids babysit others and their siblings, the reasons listed previously (phone calls, messy house, etc) keeps on track with the current course of date night. We foresee this happening until all our kiddos move on down the road.
Now there is no reason stopping you from using this principle in your marriage. Find the like-minded friends and make your dinner reservations! - 15437
We have five kids, ranging from 15 down to 9 years of age. We also happen to have some friends in a similar situation " they've got five also, though their range is a little younger. That's the key to this whole system - friends in the same boat as you.
How does it work?
What we do is quite simple - every Friday, one couple or the other has a date night. We alternate Fridays, and believe me, we very rarely miss. This is the way it works: On our date night, Julie will take the kids over to our friends house at 5:30. Kathlyn feeds the kids dinner - a big pot of spaghetti or something. After that, the kids will play with each other until about 9 when Kat brings them home to our house and puts them to bed, while Jeff puts their kids to bed. Then, Kathlyn will stay at our house until we get home, which is basically whenever we want to. When we get home, Kat goes home. The next week, we switch and they get their date night.
What's the big deal?
Let me tell you why this cinchy plan, has tremendous results for your marriage. Everything in life doesn't have to be hard to be successful, right?
* A consistent, responsible babysitter who is never late nor seldom backs out. You gotta remember the babysitter has a date already on the books for next week that depends on yours going off without a hitch.
* Doesn't cost a thing! Remember the 5 kids - a night out can cost a small king's ransom.
* It is a lot to expect a teenage girl to handle 5 children. So when you have families who do this with kids close to the same age, they tend to just do their thing. Little care needed. And we have the credentials to handle them all too!
*The old "I just trained my sitter and now she has a job, boyfriend, life, ____(fill in the blank)". And your out of luck. Doesn't happen here.
* You don't have to worry about phone calls. Stressing about what's going on at home can suck the fun out of a date faster than you can say "Help!!!!".
* There is no one to drive home or to pickup to take home. Everyone is in bed and has their own car (we actually live so close we walk back and forth a lot!) to get on their way. No dread dessert with this lovely meal, thanks!
* The house is always clean when we get here, since the kids weren't here all night. So no getting up on Saturday to throw away pizza boxes and pop cans.
* And if those weren't enough reasons, the mom who stays home always has some "her time" after she puts the other couples kids to bed. How nice to relax and catch up on the stack of mail or play Wii without the kids nagging at your inability!
My older kids can babysit my younger kids. So how does that work?
I don't know about you, but even though my older kids babysit others and their siblings, the reasons listed previously (phone calls, messy house, etc) keeps on track with the current course of date night. We foresee this happening until all our kiddos move on down the road.
Now there is no reason stopping you from using this principle in your marriage. Find the like-minded friends and make your dinner reservations! - 15437
About the Author:
Julie and Matt Hellstrom are a happily married couple with 5 lovely, impossible kids, and they've gained much practical experience during their marriage. Learn about their trials and successes at their Marriage Blog. Friday Night Date Night is just one of the many tips you'll learn at our How to Fix My Marriage website - http://howtofixmymarriage.com.
