As a male, I grew up with the concept that romance simply means a nice suit, an expensive dinner and roses or chocolates. I spend some money taking my date out for a nice dinner and she says "wow" with a twinkle in her eye, thinking I am the best man for her world. This I have found, like most preconceived notions relating to love, is a fallacy.
Once, many many moons ago, one man was the first to use the "romantic formula" described above. It worked so well for him that he told all his friends. Due to the time in history and newness of the nice dinner and flowers concept, this system of romance was brilliant for them too. All their dates were so impressed they fell in love, the couples got married had children and developed the whole valentine's day and romantic products industry.
If you get one thing out of this article, I hope its the realisation that since the first dinner, roses and chocolates date, the concept has lost its originality. Today, its a bit of a cop out, its just another date without thought. Dinner out isn't even special anymore, its something we do every week for no occasion, just to get out of the house.
There is a similar argument for flowers. Why are they seen as the special gift for your sweetheart when you also use them to: say sorry, say farewell, say welcome back, send your condolences at a funeral, say happy Mother's Day, the list goes on. They are the "for all reasons" gift and surely you understand there is nothing romantic in the common.
So what does romance mean today then. In my mind, it means exactly the same thing today, as it did to the man above who invented the dinner and flowers date.
Romance comes down to one thing, making an effort. Forget about tokenism, running some tired idea and calling it a date doesn't work anymore. You need to get into the head of your partner and do something that she likes. The point of this is in the effort, in the act of thinking about it and coming up with something appealing.
For example, a drive to the beach for fish and chips with a candle and a picnic rug could make your date way happier than a gourmet feast at an expensive restaurant. This assumes of course you have done your work and know she likes fish, driving and sand between her toes.
So shut your mind to your preconceived ideas about romance and start listening to your woman. It should all start there. What you do on a date is not nearly as important as to how you came up with the idea. All the experience needs to do to be romantic, is show you lady that you are thoughtful and focused on her needs. Its that simple. - 15437
Once, many many moons ago, one man was the first to use the "romantic formula" described above. It worked so well for him that he told all his friends. Due to the time in history and newness of the nice dinner and flowers concept, this system of romance was brilliant for them too. All their dates were so impressed they fell in love, the couples got married had children and developed the whole valentine's day and romantic products industry.
If you get one thing out of this article, I hope its the realisation that since the first dinner, roses and chocolates date, the concept has lost its originality. Today, its a bit of a cop out, its just another date without thought. Dinner out isn't even special anymore, its something we do every week for no occasion, just to get out of the house.
There is a similar argument for flowers. Why are they seen as the special gift for your sweetheart when you also use them to: say sorry, say farewell, say welcome back, send your condolences at a funeral, say happy Mother's Day, the list goes on. They are the "for all reasons" gift and surely you understand there is nothing romantic in the common.
So what does romance mean today then. In my mind, it means exactly the same thing today, as it did to the man above who invented the dinner and flowers date.
Romance comes down to one thing, making an effort. Forget about tokenism, running some tired idea and calling it a date doesn't work anymore. You need to get into the head of your partner and do something that she likes. The point of this is in the effort, in the act of thinking about it and coming up with something appealing.
For example, a drive to the beach for fish and chips with a candle and a picnic rug could make your date way happier than a gourmet feast at an expensive restaurant. This assumes of course you have done your work and know she likes fish, driving and sand between her toes.
So shut your mind to your preconceived ideas about romance and start listening to your woman. It should all start there. What you do on a date is not nearly as important as to how you came up with the idea. All the experience needs to do to be romantic, is show you lady that you are thoughtful and focused on her needs. Its that simple. - 15437
