Sunday, February 1, 2009

Is It Possible For Me To Win My Ex Boyfriend Back?

By Sarah Summers

So you had a bad breakup, and now you want him back. It's not going to be easy, but here's some tips that can help you. So many people don't succeed in winning their ex back. It's not really our fault. No one ever handed us an instruction book when we first started dating that taught us how to handle a breakup. Much less, how to get a boyfriend back after a breakup. If you really want him back into your life, here are five simple steps:

1. First of all, get rid of the self-pity. I know it's hard not to feel down after a breakup, but you have to stop feeling sorry for yourself. You have to be willing to be strong. Don't let your emotion and especially depression keep you down. You can't achieve a goal, if you can't keep your emotions in check and your mind clear. Negativity sabotages your plans even before you put them into action.

2. The past is past. Recognize the fact that the relationship in its prior form is gone and things will never be quite the same again. You can't let your mind keep wandering into the past. Focus on what is going on now. If you realize that the relationship of the past wasn't perfect you're heading in the right direction and laying the foundation for you and your ex boyfriend to get back. Remember you are most likely glossing over all the bad stuff that happened. If you broke up, it's because your past relationship had problems. Start anew.

3. Don't be obsessive. One of guys' major turnoffs are girls who seem desperate. Especially ex boyfriends. You may want to seek comfort by hearing his voice or seeing his face, but if you really want him back, you must back off for a while. Don't continuously call him, text message him, email him, or go to his place or where he hangs out just to see him. Give him time to realize he may have made a mistake. He may begin to actually miss you. Following him around like a lost puppy will only make you look pathetic, and make things harder for you.

4. Change yourself. Be someone men would desire. New clothes, makeup, hairstyle... whatever suits your fancy. If you've picked up a few pounds, start exercising and eating healthy. When you look good on the outside, you're going to start feeling better about yourself on the inside. By feeling good on the inside you will be confident and happy. When you're confident and happy, you will project this image to others. There's nothing more attractive than the aura of confidence, and even an ex-boyfriend isn't immune to this.

5. Be patient. At some point, your ex will contact you. Imagine his surprise when he sees the "new" you from step 4. He will probably be sorry that he broke up with you. Keep your physical contact with him to a minimum, if you do see him. Seeing you looking your best and seeing that you've become confident and happy will make him desire you. If you limit your physical contact with him, this will drive him crazy. Don't rush things, jumping back into a relationship again too quickly could result in another breakup and this time, it could be permanent. - 15437

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