To repair a relationship that has ended, you need to know what caused it to end. Objectively understanding what caused the relationhip to end is an important first step in getting your ex back.
The reasons for your break up can be all over the map. Infidelity. Loss of passion and interest. One or both of you felt like the magic was gone. Arguing, Fighting and Conflict " It just got to be too much. Control Issues " you or they were too pushy and controlling and smothering. Unacceptable behaviors " abuse, drinking, drugging. And on a broader scale, there are going to be two general reasons. They left you or you left them.
In order to get your ex back, you want to figure out as objectively as possible why you broke up. If you deceive yourself about this, it will only make it that much harder to actually repair the damage.
Yes, the tendency is to blame your ex for the break up. They weren't passionate enough, or they fought too much, etc. Even when we clearly wronged them, maybe by cheating, we can blame our ex.
It's important to try to get to the real issue without sugarcoating it. If they cheated on you, don't say you were the one to blame for being too distant. If you were too controlling or argumentative, don't blame them, accept responsibility.
If it's your fault, admit it! We all do idiotic or dumb things in our lives. So if you screwed up, it is really okay. You can regain the love of your ex and be forgiven, even for big mistakes. You're not an awful person for doing something you regret. It probably won't be the last time!
On the other hand, if it is your ex's fault, admit this to yourself. If they treated you badly, this happens from time to time in relationships. It doesn't mean you have to hate them forever or stay sad and alone forever. You can want your ex back even if you've been wronged, and you can forgive.
But once you know the objective reason for your break up, then you can take steps to remedy it. Even if they cheated on you or you them, you can repair the relationship if you are willing to give or accept an apology. There's more involved in repairing the relationship, obviously, but it's a start. - 15437
The reasons for your break up can be all over the map. Infidelity. Loss of passion and interest. One or both of you felt like the magic was gone. Arguing, Fighting and Conflict " It just got to be too much. Control Issues " you or they were too pushy and controlling and smothering. Unacceptable behaviors " abuse, drinking, drugging. And on a broader scale, there are going to be two general reasons. They left you or you left them.
In order to get your ex back, you want to figure out as objectively as possible why you broke up. If you deceive yourself about this, it will only make it that much harder to actually repair the damage.
Yes, the tendency is to blame your ex for the break up. They weren't passionate enough, or they fought too much, etc. Even when we clearly wronged them, maybe by cheating, we can blame our ex.
It's important to try to get to the real issue without sugarcoating it. If they cheated on you, don't say you were the one to blame for being too distant. If you were too controlling or argumentative, don't blame them, accept responsibility.
If it's your fault, admit it! We all do idiotic or dumb things in our lives. So if you screwed up, it is really okay. You can regain the love of your ex and be forgiven, even for big mistakes. You're not an awful person for doing something you regret. It probably won't be the last time!
On the other hand, if it is your ex's fault, admit this to yourself. If they treated you badly, this happens from time to time in relationships. It doesn't mean you have to hate them forever or stay sad and alone forever. You can want your ex back even if you've been wronged, and you can forgive.
But once you know the objective reason for your break up, then you can take steps to remedy it. Even if they cheated on you or you them, you can repair the relationship if you are willing to give or accept an apology. There's more involved in repairing the relationship, obviously, but it's a start. - 15437
About the Author:
For a detailed 7 Step Plan to get your ex back, you can get a book on Get Your Ex Back Today. John Laney teaches relationship skills and you can get a free relationship intelligence course at Relationship Problem Cures.
